Prudence was a lovely girl, much beloved by the sombre Gordon Brown. But when it came to the electorate dear lovely Prudence didn’t set the pulse racing. You see Prudence liked to save, Prudence liked to tax and Prudence thought it better to pay off debt rather than take on more. Prudence was not the sort of girl to ramp up charges on her credit card, nor fill her wardrobe with frivolous and flirtatious outfits, buy cars on tick, or think buy-to-let was a pension. Prudence was boring, not with the times and voters didn’t like her.
In 2000, Prudence was dumped and in walked something far more exciting – an economic minx who liked to live life fast. Spend, borrow and party hard! Saving boring, taxes ditto. The public loved her and so did the banks. The minx rejunvinated health, education, local services and a fair few MP’s moats, duck ponds and second homes.
But we all know that a minx is trouble and at some point we need to rekindle our affection for Prudence. That time has come and Prudence is going to take a lot of wooing. Even if we strip out our funding of the banks, reduce unemployment and return the economy to balanced economic growth, we will still be borrowing 8.5% of GDP each year. Prudence will be aghast and if our relations with Prudence are to return to the levels of 2000, then a long courtship is in order.
Of course, the minx will still flash you a look. Be wild, be adventurous. We can fund today by earning more tomorrow.
Your romantic choices will soon arrive in the form of the general election. The minx is dangerous, Prudence is boring. Not a great choice, but that’s life.